Monday, May 28, 2012

Ponder This...Naked Graves

It's Memorial Day and I am probably going to get roasted for this blog post. I'm just going to put that out there right now. I have decided to go public with what may be a very unpopular statement. I don't decorate graves. I understand that people like to show their appreciation for our soldiers. I am deeply appreciative of them (and their families) myself. But I do not understand decorating graves. Now, let me just say that I am not bashing people who want to do this. Everyone deals with death differently, and I respect that, so if it fills you with joy or completes you in some way, then by all means don't let me stand in your way, but I have never participated in this ritual, and here is why:

Dead people don't care what their graves look like. I'd rather buy someone living a lovely bouquet with that money than spend it on someone who is probably enjoying more flowers than you can even imagine in Heaven.

A decorated grave can't express what a person meant to me. It simply cannot. Only my private memories and shared memories which involve that person can do that.

Cemeteries are not full of memories, (unless you and the dearly departed used to hang out in cemeteries, in which case I stand corrected), so if I want to remember someone I have lost, that is the last place I would go.

I feel that honoring a person's life should be more than a trip to the cemetery each Memorial Day. Maybe it would be nice to donate the flower cash to a cause, or even a person the departed person would have supported in life.

Two days after Memorial Day, the flowers are blown all over the place, and it all looks a mess, and has to be repeatedly straightened by family/staff, which are the only people who are seeing it anyway. (See my first point.)

So, ponder this...I love people. I have lost people I love. I support our military. I support naked graves.

P.S. If I happen to be wrong about dead people looking at their graves, please don't feel bad if you never decorate mine. In fact, I'd be fine if I didn't even have one. Just remember me when you hear a song I like, or when something makes you think of a great inside joke we shared, and remember I love ya. ;-)